The Freshmen
by only-because3
Summary: But she was his brother's girlfriend, that should've marked her as strictly forbidden. Then again, it's always the forbidden fruit you want the most. NBL ONESHOT


Hey everyone! I know I really should be updating my other stories but this oneshot wouldn't leave my mind! And besides, what better way to celebrate my birthday than giving you all a new oneshot to read? It's based off of the song 'The Freshman' by The Verve Pipe. I tried to stay as close to the lyrics as possible and think I did a pretty good job. For the longest time I wasn't sure who I wanted the female character to be but figured I'd stick with the character I know how to write best. I'm also going to apologize in advanced for my horrible verb tenses lol. Thanks to Lynn and Emma for reading this for me and assuring me it was good. And.. I think that's it! I hope you have a WONDERFUL November 5th because that is the best day ever(although I'm biased lol). Enjoy!

* * *

The classroom was silent, the only sound was the shuffle of papers every so often. The teacher sat slumped at his desk, staring out of the window like a zombie. It was obvious that he didn't want to be there anymore than the students did. Even though Lucas was usually studious, he didn't really have it in him today. It was dark and damp outside and that was reflecting on his mood. So, he sat back up in his desk and began looking around the small classroom. All he saw were students that were either sleeping or doing minimal work.

His eyes stopped on the girl that sat next to the window, two seats from the front. Her hair was pulled into a loose bun, a few strands slipping out of the elastic's grasp and resting on her shoulder. Her hand rested softly on her cheek, making her look soft and sexy at the same time. In her other hand, she tapped her blue pen out of boredom or thought, he wasn't too sure which it was. After about five more taps, she tossed the pen on to her desk and stretched her arms out to the sides, scanning the room just as he had done a few moments ago.

Her eyes fell on him and he tried to make it seem like he was staring out at the rain filled world rather than her. She cast a small smile in his direction and he honestly believed it wasn't meant for him. His brother, her _boyfriend_, sat right behind him. Of course the smile was meant for him. Lucas turned around a little in order to glance at his brother who was asleep at his desk. Lucas shrugged and glanced back at her, still convinced the smile wasn't for him. But then, they locked eyes and her smile got a little bigger revealing two glorious dimples.

He looked around him once more before gesturing to himself in one last effort for clarification. She giggled and nodded as the sun poked through the clouds for a moment, illuminating the classroom and waking his slumbering brother. Nathan blinked numerous times as the sun slowly disappeared once more. His eyes traveled to his giggling girlfriend and he smiled. He caught her eye (taking them off of his brother although he didn't know that) and waved her over.

She stood up quickly and sauntered over to him, sliding into his lap. He brought her head down to kiss her and when they're lips connected, she locked eyes with Lucas while Nathan's eyes stayed closed.

* * *

They sat in the living room of his mother's house, watching a movie from opposite ends of the couch. Nathan was away at a game with Dan and Brooke decided this would be a perfect occasion to spend some quality time with Lucas. Her boyfriend's _brother_. They had ordered a pizza some time ago and it now sat half eaten on the coffee table. Brooke got up and grabbed another slice, slumping down next to Lucas and curling into his side. He glanced at her a little surprised but wrapped his arm around her none the less. She took the smallest bite of pizza before tossing it back in the box, wiping her hand on a napkin as well. It had grown silent between them, their friendly conversation stopping once the movie had started.

Suddenly, he felt her move and he looked at her again to find her staring back at him. She repositioned herself, moving so that she rested on her knees next to him. She studied his face, focussing on his lips as she leaned forward. When their lips were only a few centimeters apart, she looked into his eyes to see if there were any signs that she should stop. She saw fear but also the glint in his eyes that she also saw in Nathan's. So, she closed the gap, pressing her lips against his.

When Brooke finally left Lucas' house _the next morning_, her lips were red and swollen and she had no idea what happened to her underwear.

_

* * *

_

Most people are shocked when they find out that Nathan Scott can actually hold a conversation about something other than sports. They were equally surprised when they find out that Brooke and Nathan actually have a relationship that includes meaningful conversations instead of just fucking each other every chance they get.

But that doesn't mean they let a good time slip by.

"You want to go to dinner later tonight," Nathan asked as he grabbed his T-shirt off of the supply closet's floor and threw it back on.

"Sure. You want to try out that new Mexican place downtown," she answered, buttoning her jeans as she did so.

"Sounds good. Then maybe we can stop by that bookstore to see if they have that book you wanted." He looked over at his girlfriend as she slipped back on her final item of clothing. There was a huge smile on her face which in turn made one pop on his own face. She wrapped her arms around his neck, giving him three quick kisses in a row.

"You're wonderful you know that?"

His smile turned into a cocky smirk. "I try."

Brooke swatted him playfully before kissing him once more. "I love you."

Those three words were music to his ears every time she said them. "I love you too."

* * *

He'd been staring at the blue screen of the tv for the past couple minutes, signaling that the movie was over. This was the fourth time Brooke had come over. Although this was probably the billionth time they'd hung out, snuck around, fucked around, or whatever the hell they were doing. He knew this was wrong. She was someone else's girlfriend, that should've made him not want to have a relationship with her to begin with. But she was his **brother's** girlfriend, that should've marked her as strictly forbidden.

Then again, it's always the forbidden fruit you want the most.

Lucas was pulled out of his thoughts by the soft footsteps of the girl he longed to call his own girlfriend, although he wasn't admitting that to anyone, even himself. He should've stopped her right then and there. He should've stood up and told her to take the clothes she kept in his bottom drawer and leave.

Instead, he sat there as she wrapped her arms loosely around his neck from behind the couch and bent over to kiss his cheek. Then, she muttered the three words he'd use against her. "I love you."

* * *

Nathan was towering above her, breathing deeply and she ran her finger nails down his back in pleasure. She brought his head down to her lips and kissed him, fast and rough because then it makes a stark contrast with the sex she has with Lucas. That is slow and sensual because that's how he views sex. It is an act between two people that love each other. Only she's never heard him say it. She'd told him that she loved him, because the truth was she did, but he'd never replied.

She closed her eyes in an attempt to get her mind to shut up and allow her to enjoy Nathan thrusting in and out of her. Only now as she heard Nathan murmuring in her ear, she saw Lucas on her eyelids. After a few more moments, the two switched places and then it was Nathan she saw and Lucas she heard. She got to the point where she was so disoriented that she didn't know who she was really with and should've opened her eyes to see. It all seemed simpler with her eyes closed though. Like not knowing which she was with made it some how less wrong.

Who ever she was with collapsed on her chest, murmuring 'I love you'. She didn't hear one voice, but two, one from each of her lovers. And she replied back how she felt. "I love you too."

* * *

_She sat on his couch and he leaned over to kiss her cheek when she leaned away. She'd been chewing on her thumb nail for the past ten minutes and he knew something was wrong. "I'm pregnant."_

He doesn't know why he acted the way he did. He saw his whole life crashing down in front of him and in one split second, he became Dan. He panicked and started shouting, throwing the book he had had in his hands at his bedroom door. He had leaped from the bed and then he shouted that it wasn't even his. She had begun crying and had told him that it was, that it all went back to the night Nathan was away, and the first time they'd gotten together.

And that's when he might as well have slapped her in the face. "_Abort it." _She had looked at him so shocked and hurt that when he closed his eyes now, all he saw was that face. The face that was normally so bright and full of life and love was shattered.

She left without another word.

He hadn't heard from her in two days.

* * *

Brooke laid on her back, her hair messy and eyes red. She was numb from the waist down and the only thing she could think about was how she didn't want to do this. She was sixteen years old, still in high school, and her baby was her boyfriend's brother's. Every logical thought and reason were screaming that this was the best answer. Still, she couldn't help feeling like this was wrong. She wanted to feel her baby move inside her and was even willing to get fat if it meant that she got to gold the baby she'd created with someone she loved.

But then Lucas' reaction would play in her mind. She knew that if she went through with the pregnancy, Lucas would hate her and as petty as it sounded, she couldn't bare that.

Thirty minutes later, she walked back into the waiting room, wiping her eyes furiously. Nathan stood up from his chair, a surprisingly sad expression on his face. He wrapped his arms around Brooke's petite form and let her sob against his chest. He ducked his head down to whisper soothing words in her ear.

The ride to Brooke's was silent and when Nathan pulled in front of the house, he cut the engine and turned to face her. He grabbed her hand softly and laced his fingers with hers. "You didn't have to do it Brooke. I told you that we could raise it."

She stared at their enter twined hands, the tears welling up in her eyes. She had to do this. It wasn't fair to him. "It wasn't yours," she whispered through her tears. Quickly, she pulled her hand from his and opened the car door, ready to run into her house. He grabbed her arm, not hurtfully, but with enough strength to keep her in the car.

He looked shattered, like those three words broke him. "You said you loved me." His voice was low and shaky and Brooke thought she saw tears in his eyes.

She pulled her arm out of his grasp and used her thumb to brush away that had fallen on to his cheek. With tears in her eyes, she muttered the words that would crush whatever was left of his heart. "I loved him too."

She got out of the car then and slammed the door shut. She was halfway to her door when she heard Nathan. "Did he love you?"

She kept walking.

* * *

Nathan rolled over in his bed and breathed the scent of Brooke's green apple shampoo which had become a permanent smell on the left side of his bed. He sighed and laid on his back, trying to get Brooke out of his head. What she had done was wrong and he knew that he shouldn't take her back. But she looked so heartbroken when he'd dropped her off three days ago. And despite what she did, he still loved her. She was hurting and he wanted to hold her and tell her everything would be okay. That whoever she loved didn't deserve her.

Then he can't help but think he should've been able to stop it. He could tell by the look in her eyes that she didn't want to have the abortion. He should've tried harder to talk her out of it. He should've loved her more. Because maybe if he loved her more, then she wouldn't have strayed or at least listened to him when he said that they could be a family.

"Fuck," he muttered as he sat up in bed. He needed to stop thinking about her. He needed to get out of the house and do something. He'd been blowing off school and work for the past three days and though he was in need of a distraction, neither options sounded pleasing. So, instead he pulled on a pair of basketball shorts and grabbed his ipod. A run seemed like the best option.

* * *

She hadn't left the house in three days. She'd called Lucas, informing him of what she did and he'd hung up on her. Nathan left her voicemail about how he needed time to think which was really just code for 'We're over.'

Crawling out of bed, she walked into her parent's bathroom and looked at the numerous pill bottles and tablet packs on the counter next to her mother's sink. She picked up the box of valium, barely skimming the dosage and effects. She flipped the box over and began punching out every tablet. She swallowed each each pill before grabbing the already half used box that was in her mother's old over night bag. She took the remaining five before crawling back into her bed.

She was already starting to feel better.

* * *

Lucas sat in silence in his room. He'd been alone with is thoughts for the past few days. His cell phone wrung from his bedside table and he immediately thought it was Brooke. He almost felt bad for what had gone on between them and felt like he should apologize. But then he remembered that it was her fault. She fell in love with him.

When he looked at the ID on his phone, he was shocked to se Nathan's name flash up at him. "Hello?"

All he heard were what sounded like sobs and he wondered for a moment if it was a prank call. "She's dead Luke." His brow furrowed in confusion and he found himself asking what instead of who.

"She took valium," Nathan paused before swallowing another sob. "She's dead."

* * *

He used to walk past the cemetery everyday when he was little. It was on the route he and his mother took on the way to the cafe. Everyday they would pass, and everyday he would stare. Occasionally, they'd walk past just as lines of cars drove into the vast amount of land surrounded by black iron gates. He can even remember once specific time when they walked past a family departing from one of the funerals. The woman was crying uncontrollably and her two daughters were on her sides, helping her make it to the car. The woman had been so sad, that Lucas had realized at seven just how powerful love was.

It was a cloudy day and rain poured from the sky. He sat in his car across the street from the cemetery where Brooke's funeral was taking place. He felt like it was inappropriate of him to attend the cemetery because he knew that in some way, her death was his fault. He may not have pulled the trigger, but he was the one who gave her the loaded gun.

He jumped a little when he heard a knock on his window and he turned to see his brother staring back at him. He rolled down his window, rain drops spilling into his car one by one, slowly soaking into him. Nathan looked like crap. He was dressed a black suit and his hair was messy. His eyes were red and he had dark circles under his eyes.

"It was you wasn't it?" Nathan asked him in a raised voice full of sorrow. They locked eyes and in doing so, Lucas had to look away.

And that's when he knew. It was his _brother_ who had been with his now dead girlfriend.

Lucas mumbled some sort of apology and quickly rolled up is window before driving away.

* * *

They met at his mother's cafe a few years later. Their already strained relationship was nearly nonexistent after what had gone on during their junior year. They kept minimal contact with one another, probably only because they were brothers and it felt like the right thing to do. When they did speak, they never spoke of Brooke or the time they both spent with her, and more importantly her death. She was like a memory that they tried to pretend they forgot.

When Nathan walked into the cafe, he found his brother near the back and sat down quietly. They exchanged polite hellos before ordering their meals. "How's Haley?" Lucas asked after taking a sip of his coffee.

Nathan shrugged, his face blank. "We broke up a few months ago." Lucas nodded and tried to give him a sympathetic smile only it didn't make it on to his face. "What about you and Peyton?"

"We're alright I guess. We don't see each other much," Lucas responded, fiddling with his paper napkin to avoid his brother's eyes. After Brooke, neither of them had a healthy relationship. Neither were fully committed and after a while, their girlfriends appeared to be only someone to help pass the time.

He hadn't even realized it until Nathan had said it. "It was today." Lucas blinked, shocked that he was actually bringing it up. Nathan was silent for a few more moments before continuing. "You know, I never cried, like really cried, till she died," Nathan finished, his eyes focussed on his plate, trying to sound void of any emotion.

"Nate," Lucas started, trying to get his brother to let it go. Not talking about it, about _her_, was easier. Brining it back up wouldn't be good for any of them. Nathan just shook his head.

"I think about her all the time." Lucas sighed and shifted in his seat uncomfortably. When he was younger, he used to be the nice one who knew how to make people feel better, who knew how to fix things.

So, he muttered the only thing he could think of. "It's not your fault."

Nathan looked him straight in the eye, something he hadn't done since Brooke's funeral. "Is it your fault then?" Nathan's eyes were dark and icy, almost as if he were challenging his brother. And once again, Lucas had to look away from his brother. It was quiet between them for a while. Nathan had nothing more to say and Lucas didn't know how to react.

"It's not my fault she fell in love." It's a lame excuse to say the least, but it was what he had told himself every time he thought about her. Because then he wouldn't be able to feel the immense guilt he knew he should be feeling.

Nathan let out a bitter laugh. "Whatever helps you sleep at night Lucas." He reached into the back pocket of his jeans and pulled out his wallet. He threw a twenty on the table before standing up. "It's been five and a half years. Stop being such a dick."

* * *

Later that day a little boy and his mother walked past the cemetery on 34th and U. The boy's blue eyes were focussed on the tall man standing in front of a gravestone. The man's head was hung and his shoulders shook. The boy let go of his mother's hand when she stopped to talk to a friend and he wandered up to the edge of the cemetery, wrapping his small hands around two of the black iron bars that surrounded the vast property. The older man dropped to his knees and it was then that the boy saw his tear stained face.

Out of curiosity and sympathy for the man that didn't look much older than his mother, the boy squeezed through the metal bars. He walked slowly towards the man, his feet crunching the colorful fall leaves with every step he took. He stopped short of the man, reading what the stone before him said.

Though young in age, the boy spoke precociously. "Did you love her," he asked almost shyly.

Lucas shook his head. "Not like I should've." He turned to face the boy, wiping his face with the backs of his hands. The boy looked up at him with big blue eyes that Lucas could see himself in. "Always love someone when you can," Lucas said, sniffing once more. "Let them know how you feel always. Before it's too late."

The boy looked confused and was about to say something when his mother frantically started calling him back. The boy turned, glancing at Lucas before running back to his mom. Lucas looked at the woman, her dark auburn hair mirroring the hair Brooke had had. When her son reached her, the woman's dimples appeared and Lucas felt tears on the edge of his eyes. That could've been Brooke.

His memory of her has been slowly fading over time, probably because he's tried to completely block her out. He didn't want to have any memory of her ever existing. He didn't want to remember her two wonderful dimples or her beautiful chocolate colored hair. He didn't want to remember how her voice was always extra raspy in the morning or that she used to devour his mother's hot chocolate because she thought it was 'the best ever'.

He shut his eyes as tears streamed down his cheeks. He had to get her out of his head. He'd done a good job of blocking her out up until Nathan had reminded him of her. The tears continued to pour down his cheeks and the only thing he could see on his eye lids was Brooke. He saw her sitting at her desk in English, smiling at him for the first time. He saw her lying on his bed in just his gray sweatshirt, reading over his shoulder. He saw her sitting in his mother's cafe, drinking his hot chocolate, wrapped up in a bundle of red. He saw her face when she was at the mall with Nathan, a dimpled smile on her face as she looked up at her _boyfriend_ lovingly. Then he saw her face after he told her to abort _their_ baby.

He opened his eyes quickly because he couldn't take it any more. He looked up at her gravestone and saw her sitting on it. Her legs were crossed and covered in black and white striped socks that Nathan had got her for Halloween a year before Lucas had any thought of touching her. She had on an old T-shirt of his and a classic Brooke Davis mini skirt. She smiled down at him and mouthed the words he'd never been able to return. "I love you."

He wanted so badly to return it. He did love her. He loved her with all his heart. But he'd never said it because it was wrong. It was wrong to be with her and it was wrong to love her. So, he'd stayed guarded the only way he knew how; by pretending it was just physical. He couldn't have ignored her completely because he yearned to have her in his life. But to admit his feelings would have only lead to someone getting hurt.

Of course, he'd only realized once it was too late that when involved in a triangle, someone always gets hurt.

He looked at her gravestone again, only to find 'Brooke' in a pair of sweat pants and his sweatshirt. Her hair was knotted and her eyes were red. That was how she looked the last time he'd seen her alive. Her dimpled smile was gone and she looked hollowed, shattered. Still, she muttered the words he'd never been able to return. "I love you."

Hearing those three words are like knives that slice through his body. They make his heart break with each syllable. She shouldn't have loved him after what he'd told her to do yet somehow she did. And yet he still wasn't able to say the words. "I love you."

The more he hears the words the more he wants to rip his ears off. He dug his hands into his hair, squeezing his head to try and block out the words. "I love you."

"Stop, please stop," he found himself mumbling. His face was soaked with tears of regret and pain and heartache. He can't take back what he's done and only now is his guilt catching up with him. He tried to tell himself the only truth he knows; that they were all just too young. They had all been stupid and had gotten in way over their heads. They used to think that they knew everything but that was a complete lie. They didn't know shit (they probably still didn't). They were merely freshman; naive and inexperienced with life.

"I love you."

He has to scream until she's gone.

And even though when he opened his eyes again he can't see her in front of him, he knew that she would never be gone from his mind.


End file.
